Last Sunday was Father's Day... Mummy didn't forget to wish Daddy a Happy Father's Day on behalf of you boys.
We took Grandpa (Daddy's Daddy that is) out for dinner last night at Palm Beach to have his favourite crispy duck. Obviously Granny was protesting initially because it is not exactly very healthy... but then again sometimes we must learn to let go. Going to have another big dinner (again) with my Dad this Sunday. Daddy's uncle and family from the states just flew in today around midnight... so we are going to have lots of food for dinner tonight again. Hmmm... I wonder how many more kilos I will be putting on. Mummy has put on 4 kg since the wedding... that is bad because I have never never hit the big 5 on the weighing machine in my entire life.
Uncle Brian accidentally dropped his car key yesterday (again... yes again) and for that Granny was damn upset with him for being careless. But lucky for him... his colleague found his key and of course we found out (or at least suspect) that he might be seeing someone new... that at least made Granny a little happier.
I didn't know who leaked out the news that I was pregnant. During the fire drill yesterday alot of colleagues from my division came to me and told me that I can actually be exempted from it. I didn't have a choice but to "declare" that I had a miscarriage... I didn't know how I got the courage to shrug it off just like that at that point in time. But after that it got to me and engulfed me slowly... the sadness hit me again. I miss you both...
Showing posts with label Morbid Days. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Morbid Days. Show all posts
Tuesday, 22 June 2004
Monday, 14 June 2004
Waiting for the Day to be Over
What a way to start a new day, a new week. Nothing seems to be going right since morning.
Realised that my one-month bonus wasn't credited into my account with my salary and neither was it reflected in my payslip. Accounts directed me to Human Resource... so now am waiting for the officer to give me a good reason for holding back the payment. I just couldn't figure the reason for it... but I have this nagging feeling that it isn't looking too good.
Damn!!!! I hate it whenever we are rushing for something... somewhere someone will sit on something. First its my boss then followed by Gerald Lee... as though it is some sort of standard operating procedure. He has been sitting on the Memo since last week and despite the chasing there is still no news from him. In the end I have to humble myself to continuously "beg" his secretary for an answer. She sounded pissed... but similarly I am pissed with her attitude as well. But what to do other than trying hard to bear with it. As always... I will be the one sandwiched between the Board and the Applicant. Why can't these people have a sense of urgency when the need arises??? Arrgghhh... if not for the regular working hours... I really cannot find a reason for liking this job.
There has been alot of news of miscarriages lately. Three forumers in the miscarriage support thread had recurrent miscarriages... all in a matter of less than 2 weeks. Another lady whom I got to know in the February 2004 bride thread lost her baby last Saturday. I can't help but wonder the percentage of recurrent miscarriages.
Speaking of which... today is exactly 2 months since we lost you angels. Time seems to be flying as though it was only yesterday... but during which alot of things had happened making it felt as though the days are crawling.
I can't wait for today to be over.
Realised that my one-month bonus wasn't credited into my account with my salary and neither was it reflected in my payslip. Accounts directed me to Human Resource... so now am waiting for the officer to give me a good reason for holding back the payment. I just couldn't figure the reason for it... but I have this nagging feeling that it isn't looking too good.
Damn!!!! I hate it whenever we are rushing for something... somewhere someone will sit on something. First its my boss then followed by Gerald Lee... as though it is some sort of standard operating procedure. He has been sitting on the Memo since last week and despite the chasing there is still no news from him. In the end I have to humble myself to continuously "beg" his secretary for an answer. She sounded pissed... but similarly I am pissed with her attitude as well. But what to do other than trying hard to bear with it. As always... I will be the one sandwiched between the Board and the Applicant. Why can't these people have a sense of urgency when the need arises??? Arrgghhh... if not for the regular working hours... I really cannot find a reason for liking this job.
There has been alot of news of miscarriages lately. Three forumers in the miscarriage support thread had recurrent miscarriages... all in a matter of less than 2 weeks. Another lady whom I got to know in the February 2004 bride thread lost her baby last Saturday. I can't help but wonder the percentage of recurrent miscarriages.
Speaking of which... today is exactly 2 months since we lost you angels. Time seems to be flying as though it was only yesterday... but during which alot of things had happened making it felt as though the days are crawling.
I can't wait for today to be over.
Thursday, 27 May 2004
The Waiting Game
In a span of just one week, two ladies in the miscarriage support thread have confirmed their pregnancy. So glad to know that people eventually do move on. Let us pray that things will go smoothly for them this time round... once is more than enough.
As for me... I am still waiting patiently for the first menstrual cycle after the D&C to start. It should be due tomorrow but doesn't seem to be getting any PMS signs... chances are high that I will have to continue with my wait.
Life is indeed a waiting game. Some things are beyond our control... so there is nothing we can do but wait patiently. We wait to see if the menses visit, we wait to pay for the pregnancy test kit, we wait for the blue line to appear on the test kit, we wait for our turn at the gynae's, we wait to see the heartbeat, we wait to see if the baby is growing... and of course the few unfortunate few will have to wait for the D&C, to wait for the first menstrual cycle, to wait for the green light from the gynae before we try and conceive again... and the whole cycle just starts again.
Right now... Mummy is waiting for her lunch break. After that I will look for something else to wait for.
As for me... I am still waiting patiently for the first menstrual cycle after the D&C to start. It should be due tomorrow but doesn't seem to be getting any PMS signs... chances are high that I will have to continue with my wait.
Life is indeed a waiting game. Some things are beyond our control... so there is nothing we can do but wait patiently. We wait to see if the menses visit, we wait to pay for the pregnancy test kit, we wait for the blue line to appear on the test kit, we wait for our turn at the gynae's, we wait to see the heartbeat, we wait to see if the baby is growing... and of course the few unfortunate few will have to wait for the D&C, to wait for the first menstrual cycle, to wait for the green light from the gynae before we try and conceive again... and the whole cycle just starts again.
Right now... Mummy is waiting for her lunch break. After that I will look for something else to wait for.
Thursday, 20 May 2004
Pulling Through Together
Time really flies...
It's been almost 2 weeks since Mummy & Daddy had came back from our holiday & are slowly getting back to some semblance of normalcy in our day-to-day lives...
It's also been a tough couple of weeks for Mummy as she really misses you. Daddy misses you guys too, & there is always a tinge of sadness whenever I see something that reminds me of you guys. But you guys have a strong Mummy & she is really trying hard to pull herself through this. Daddy can only just lend a shoulder for her to cry on. So, the three of us will have to do our best to comfort Mummy together & help her through this time. It's our first big job as a family & our first test, & I'm confident we'll pull through it with flying colours.
It's been almost 2 weeks since Mummy & Daddy had came back from our holiday & are slowly getting back to some semblance of normalcy in our day-to-day lives...
It's also been a tough couple of weeks for Mummy as she really misses you. Daddy misses you guys too, & there is always a tinge of sadness whenever I see something that reminds me of you guys. But you guys have a strong Mummy & she is really trying hard to pull herself through this. Daddy can only just lend a shoulder for her to cry on. So, the three of us will have to do our best to comfort Mummy together & help her through this time. It's our first big job as a family & our first test, & I'm confident we'll pull through it with flying colours.
Monday, 17 May 2004
Is it Me or The Hormones?
Another weekend just whisked by. We celebrated Mother's Day (belated that is) with Daddy's family on Saturday and with Mummy's family on Sunday. Just realised that I have put on 2kg for the past 1 month... time to cut back on food intake hereafter.
I wonder what is wrong with me... always feeling down for no apparent reason... can't quite pinpoint the cause of the mood swings. Not sure if it is because I have been too overwhelmed lately with having to juggle many things all at the same time... trying to settle into the new environment, adapting to the changes in life and coping with the miscarriage. Will try hard to keep my cool, my sanity, my identity.
I wonder what is wrong with me... always feeling down for no apparent reason... can't quite pinpoint the cause of the mood swings. Not sure if it is because I have been too overwhelmed lately with having to juggle many things all at the same time... trying to settle into the new environment, adapting to the changes in life and coping with the miscarriage. Will try hard to keep my cool, my sanity, my identity.
Friday, 14 May 2004
It's Been a Month...
Today is exactly one month since you guys left us. It would have been the start of the 15th gestation week as well. If everything had went well Mummy should be able to feel your movement in a week or two.
Though Mummy still sobs now and then when emotions get the better of me... I think we have been coping well. No more questioning why... just a tinge of sadness because we miss you both.
I used to think that we will move on from this episode but I realise that we will never be able to. We will learn to cope with it better over time but I now believe that we will still think and miss you guys until our final days on Earth... because perhaps that is when we will finally get to see each other face to face.
We love you.
Though Mummy still sobs now and then when emotions get the better of me... I think we have been coping well. No more questioning why... just a tinge of sadness because we miss you both.
I used to think that we will move on from this episode but I realise that we will never be able to. We will learn to cope with it better over time but I now believe that we will still think and miss you guys until our final days on Earth... because perhaps that is when we will finally get to see each other face to face.
We love you.
Tuesday, 11 May 2004
The Good and Bad of Knowing Why
This silly Mummy had an outburst again yesterday... and I thought that I was strong... guess not. Was reading some articles off the internet yesterday and it probably got me overly emotional.
Guess that it was just never meant to be... even from the beginning...
How true... the many questions which I had constantly asked myself if it was because of something I did or ate. But as much as I try to console myself that it is for the better rather than have you angels to live with some abnormalities for the rest of your lives... it is never easy to accept that fact... the fact that my angels did not have the rights to be normal, to live...
We saw Dr. Lim for a follow-up today. Everything is ok with mummy now and the blood clot has cleared. Theoretically we will need to wait for 3 months to be up before trying for the next baby but Dr. Lim said that Mummy is physically fit even if we should conceive before that. But I know that most importantly we must be emotionally and psychologically ready to accept the next baby as another separate being and not as a replacement to fill the void...
But Daddy and Mummy have confidence... because each one of you including your little brothers and sisters are special in your own ways.
Also came upon an interesting website on how this lady had to deal with 8 miscarriages... the poems she wrote, the recount of each miscarriage. She suggested that writing journals, having some sort of memorial is a good way to grieve and heal... but I doubt that you guys will ever get to read this blogspot.
Saw a young mummy feeling all excited after getting out from Dr. Lim's room. I think its the first time she is seeing her angel...
Guess that it was just never meant to be... even from the beginning...
When you conceive and a baby is created, it takes half its genes from the sperm and half from the egg that ovulated that month. At the exact time of conception, the cross-over of these genes takes place. Sometimes, for no reason other than bad luck, some information is lost and the pregnancy is destined from that point not to be. It might be that this lost information is not needed for many weeks, and the pregnancy will continue as normal until that time. When the needed information is not there, it is then that the baby dies
How true... the many questions which I had constantly asked myself if it was because of something I did or ate. But as much as I try to console myself that it is for the better rather than have you angels to live with some abnormalities for the rest of your lives... it is never easy to accept that fact... the fact that my angels did not have the rights to be normal, to live...
These are the most common reasons that women miscarry. Not because of something you did or didn't do, but just because of chance. Not because you drank alcohol, ate some unpasteurised cheese, or didn't take folic acid. Certainly not because you had sex or didn't rest enough. Whether you lay in bed from the day of your positive pregnancy test or went hang-gliding every day wouldn't have changed things. Its nature's way of making sure that when you do have a baby, it has the best chance for all of its life.
We saw Dr. Lim for a follow-up today. Everything is ok with mummy now and the blood clot has cleared. Theoretically we will need to wait for 3 months to be up before trying for the next baby but Dr. Lim said that Mummy is physically fit even if we should conceive before that. But I know that most importantly we must be emotionally and psychologically ready to accept the next baby as another separate being and not as a replacement to fill the void...
The "replacement child" syndrome is very real and there are two main problems associated with it. The first is that parents delay their grief until after the new baby comes or they think that by having another baby right away, they won't have to grieve at all.
But Daddy and Mummy have confidence... because each one of you including your little brothers and sisters are special in your own ways.
Also came upon an interesting website on how this lady had to deal with 8 miscarriages... the poems she wrote, the recount of each miscarriage. She suggested that writing journals, having some sort of memorial is a good way to grieve and heal... but I doubt that you guys will ever get to read this blogspot.
Saw a young mummy feeling all excited after getting out from Dr. Lim's room. I think its the first time she is seeing her angel...
Monday, 10 May 2004
Back to Reality
After a really long holiday... Daddy and Mummy are finally back to reality, to the rat race. Time flies... its been almost a month since we went on leave.
Not too bad a morning for Mummy though... just lots of email to clear and read through whatever files left on the table. Mummy's boss has been engaged in endless meetings since the morning so I guess that I can skive a bit for now and slowly get myself out of the holiday mood.
Seems like lots to pick up from where I had left them... the work, the daily news...
Not too bad a morning for Mummy though... just lots of email to clear and read through whatever files left on the table. Mummy's boss has been engaged in endless meetings since the morning so I guess that I can skive a bit for now and slowly get myself out of the holiday mood.
Seems like lots to pick up from where I had left them... the work, the daily news...
Tuesday, 20 April 2004
Aftermath
Mummy went back to the gynae for a follow-up this morning. Everything is ok except that there was still a bit of tissue left over or blood clot but it is not too much of a concern. May get bits of bleeding over the next 7 to 10 days but that's normal as according to the gynae. Almost teared this morning when I had the ultrasound scan done... the empty feeling set in again because all I could see was an empty uterus.
Over the past few days... friends and even Dr. Lim shared with us their personal experiences... we then realised that actually quite a handful of them had gone through miscarriages as well. I guess that not many people like to share such experiences unless necessary. It is indeed painful... it is a lost of life... more so when it your own baby.
After much trouble, changes after changes and hard work (on Daddy's part)... our travel plans have been firmed up. Finally going for the long awaited trip this coming Thursday. This was suppose to be our honeymoon... but now it is part of the healing process.
Tomorrow will be exactly one week... but I think we have done well.
Over the past few days... friends and even Dr. Lim shared with us their personal experiences... we then realised that actually quite a handful of them had gone through miscarriages as well. I guess that not many people like to share such experiences unless necessary. It is indeed painful... it is a lost of life... more so when it your own baby.
After much trouble, changes after changes and hard work (on Daddy's part)... our travel plans have been firmed up. Finally going for the long awaited trip this coming Thursday. This was suppose to be our honeymoon... but now it is part of the healing process.
Tomorrow will be exactly one week... but I think we have done well.
Monday, 19 April 2004
Restoring Normalcy into Life
Today is Daddy's attempt at restoring normalcy into life; back to work...
However, while everything is the same as I left it, everything is different now. It was so difficult to take down your pictures, I had so wanted to add in the more... Now, the pictures will remain in Daddy & Mummy's hearts... While I wish I had the chance to hold your tiny bodies in my hands, that is no longer possible. Now, I could only hold your tiny spirits in my heart & in Mummy's heart...
But coming back to work makes me realise that life does go on, no matter how much we want it to stop. We grieve for you, but as I told Mummy, I am also determined to celebrate your 8 weeks of life. When I see the two of you in the afterlife, I want to be able to tell you that Daddy & Mummy had done well in life, not in terms of material possessions, or career, but in what's important, our family...
For now, we concentrate on the physical & emotional healing, which we can feel you helping us through... When the time is right, we will try again, to bring your brothers and sisters into this world. But till then, we will take things one step at a time...
Rest well, my boys... Be good... I love you...
However, while everything is the same as I left it, everything is different now. It was so difficult to take down your pictures, I had so wanted to add in the more... Now, the pictures will remain in Daddy & Mummy's hearts... While I wish I had the chance to hold your tiny bodies in my hands, that is no longer possible. Now, I could only hold your tiny spirits in my heart & in Mummy's heart...
But coming back to work makes me realise that life does go on, no matter how much we want it to stop. We grieve for you, but as I told Mummy, I am also determined to celebrate your 8 weeks of life. When I see the two of you in the afterlife, I want to be able to tell you that Daddy & Mummy had done well in life, not in terms of material possessions, or career, but in what's important, our family...
For now, we concentrate on the physical & emotional healing, which we can feel you helping us through... When the time is right, we will try again, to bring your brothers and sisters into this world. But till then, we will take things one step at a time...
Rest well, my boys... Be good... I love you...
Sunday, 18 April 2004
Keeping Myself Occupied
Pushed my plans a little and got down to doing some cleaning of the room today.
Have also decided that its time to groom myself a little... have been putting that off for quite a while because while carrying the two of you all I could think of was sleep through the weekend. So time to go straighten my hair tomorrow. I take it as another step to getting my life back to normal.
Mummy is definitely feeling a little bit better today... gotta give myself a pat on the back for that. But I was thinking earlier this morning wondering how my two angels would have looked like. Got me a bit sniffy though thinking about it. Hopefully it didn't get on daddy's nerves... bleah.
Have also decided that its time to groom myself a little... have been putting that off for quite a while because while carrying the two of you all I could think of was sleep through the weekend. So time to go straighten my hair tomorrow. I take it as another step to getting my life back to normal.
Mummy is definitely feeling a little bit better today... gotta give myself a pat on the back for that. But I was thinking earlier this morning wondering how my two angels would have looked like. Got me a bit sniffy though thinking about it. Hopefully it didn't get on daddy's nerves... bleah.
Saturday, 17 April 2004
The Aimless Days...
Mummy has been grounded for the last few days. Daddy and I were suppose to re-visit Mt. Faber and have a picnic there yesterday... something which we haven't done for quite a while. But Daddy's granny has left strict instructions that I am suppose to stay in and get some rest. Oh well... for now we will be good.
But we had a great time spending 2 hours in bed in the morning reminiscing the happenings for the past one year. Its been a great year full of wonderful memories and we know that we will have many more to come. Well... life became a little aimless for me after the wedding... your arrival was something we were all looking forward to a "project" which will keep me occupied for the next 20 to 30 years... or maybe for the rest of my life. But its ok... for now I will concentrate on getting myself back to normal both physically and emotionally... we know that the next baby will be here soon.
Finding Nemo kept us occupied for a while yesterday. Its the second time we are watching it but never fails to tickle me. I'm sure you will love it too.
The report from the gynae came in today. Nothing conclusive...
But we are both feeling much better as each day passes by. Glad to say that we are all healing well. My tears should be running out soon.
The aimless life has made me lost count of the days. All I get to do is eat and rest, eat and rest. Giving myself another day to live my life like that. Come Monday I will have to start getting things done before flying off to Sydney for our long awaited trip.
But we had a great time spending 2 hours in bed in the morning reminiscing the happenings for the past one year. Its been a great year full of wonderful memories and we know that we will have many more to come. Well... life became a little aimless for me after the wedding... your arrival was something we were all looking forward to a "project" which will keep me occupied for the next 20 to 30 years... or maybe for the rest of my life. But its ok... for now I will concentrate on getting myself back to normal both physically and emotionally... we know that the next baby will be here soon.
Finding Nemo kept us occupied for a while yesterday. Its the second time we are watching it but never fails to tickle me. I'm sure you will love it too.
The report from the gynae came in today. Nothing conclusive...
But we are both feeling much better as each day passes by. Glad to say that we are all healing well. My tears should be running out soon.
The aimless life has made me lost count of the days. All I get to do is eat and rest, eat and rest. Giving myself another day to live my life like that. Come Monday I will have to start getting things done before flying off to Sydney for our long awaited trip.
Friday, 16 April 2004
Dear Tristan & Kiefer
14 April 2004, 10 am…
“Sorry, I can’t seem to find the heartbeats.”
My heart sank and my world crashed …tears rolled down uncontrollably… I didn’t know what else I could do other than cry. That was when I knew that we had lost them both. There were no tell-tale signs… no bleeding, no spotting. All we could see on the monitor were the two little heads and their little arms and legs. Their hearts had stopped… so did ours.
They were identical… same hair, same facial features, same genes. Never expected them to share the same fate.
14 April 2004, 12.30 pm…
The wait for the D & C seemed like forever. But it was also the last few moments I could feel them inside me. The afternoon sun was shining brightly as ever… it pains me to know that they will never get to feel the warm of the sun, smell the roses and feel the light breeze brush their hair. The world will never be perfect but I’m sure they will find it beautiful despite the flaws.
I was told not to drink or eat before the surgery. I never knew how a patient waiting to be operated on could stand the thirst… because I could never live without water. But now I know… when the world stops… nothing else matters.
My tears couldn’t stop flowing.
14 April 2004, 1.30 pm…
We made our way back to the clinic for the surgery at 2.00 p.m.
The sun is still bright and scorching hot… but as we came closer to town the sky was partially covered with dark clouds. It felt as if the sky was feeling sorry for us.
14 April 2004, 2.00 pm…
Changed and waited outside the operating theatre for the gynae.
The tears just flowed endlessly. There was nothing I could do to make myself feel any better. It was the last private moments I had with my two angels.
14 April 2004, 2.15 pm…
“The first needle is painkiller and the second needle will put you to sleep… when you wake up it will be over.”
But I don’t want it to be over… to us it was just the beginning of a new life. We had so many plans for them… we were suppose to share many many more happy moments together.
My tears flowed. I lost consciousness.
14 April 2004, 3.30 pm…
As promised… it was over… but definitely not my sadness.
14 April 2004… after the sun had set… the night seemed longer and darker than any other days. Its been a while since I cried this hard…
Feeling helpless… we could only hug and cry. We did our best to console each other.
15 April 2004, 5.00 am….
Woke up after finally getting my eyes to rest for a while. I felt different… physically back to normal… no more feeling nauseous when I wake up in the morning, no more running to the washroom five to six times during the night to empty to my bladder, no more giddy spells and the bulge at my lower ab was gone. If only I could… I will gladly trade my emotional sufferings for all the physical discomfort… but it will not be possible.
My tears never seem to run out.
15 April 2004, 10.00 am…
Its been 24 hours.
The sky is as beautiful as ever… the world didn’t stop. I know I will move on eventually. Bumps on the road is inevitable… but I believe that I will pick myself up, dust it off and get on with my life. But for now… I just want mine to stop… just for a little while to let me grieve a little for my two angels.
Dear Tristan and Kiefer,
Daddy and Mummy will always love you forever… we will miss you.
Thank you for letting us feel how great parents are.
Thank you for bringing us the joy and happiness even though it was a little short-lived… but it was good and will always be part of us.
We were so looking forward to your arrival… but we know that it will never be. We will take comfort in knowing that you will have each other for company wherever you are.
We know that our angels will be looking out for us and their little brothers and sisters.
Take care… you will always be our two little angels.
Luv
Daddy and Mummy
“Sorry, I can’t seem to find the heartbeats.”
My heart sank and my world crashed …tears rolled down uncontrollably… I didn’t know what else I could do other than cry. That was when I knew that we had lost them both. There were no tell-tale signs… no bleeding, no spotting. All we could see on the monitor were the two little heads and their little arms and legs. Their hearts had stopped… so did ours.
They were identical… same hair, same facial features, same genes. Never expected them to share the same fate.
14 April 2004, 12.30 pm…
The wait for the D & C seemed like forever. But it was also the last few moments I could feel them inside me. The afternoon sun was shining brightly as ever… it pains me to know that they will never get to feel the warm of the sun, smell the roses and feel the light breeze brush their hair. The world will never be perfect but I’m sure they will find it beautiful despite the flaws.
I was told not to drink or eat before the surgery. I never knew how a patient waiting to be operated on could stand the thirst… because I could never live without water. But now I know… when the world stops… nothing else matters.
My tears couldn’t stop flowing.
14 April 2004, 1.30 pm…
We made our way back to the clinic for the surgery at 2.00 p.m.
The sun is still bright and scorching hot… but as we came closer to town the sky was partially covered with dark clouds. It felt as if the sky was feeling sorry for us.
14 April 2004, 2.00 pm…
Changed and waited outside the operating theatre for the gynae.
The tears just flowed endlessly. There was nothing I could do to make myself feel any better. It was the last private moments I had with my two angels.
14 April 2004, 2.15 pm…
“The first needle is painkiller and the second needle will put you to sleep… when you wake up it will be over.”
But I don’t want it to be over… to us it was just the beginning of a new life. We had so many plans for them… we were suppose to share many many more happy moments together.
My tears flowed. I lost consciousness.
14 April 2004, 3.30 pm…
As promised… it was over… but definitely not my sadness.
14 April 2004… after the sun had set… the night seemed longer and darker than any other days. Its been a while since I cried this hard…
Feeling helpless… we could only hug and cry. We did our best to console each other.
15 April 2004, 5.00 am….
Woke up after finally getting my eyes to rest for a while. I felt different… physically back to normal… no more feeling nauseous when I wake up in the morning, no more running to the washroom five to six times during the night to empty to my bladder, no more giddy spells and the bulge at my lower ab was gone. If only I could… I will gladly trade my emotional sufferings for all the physical discomfort… but it will not be possible.
My tears never seem to run out.
15 April 2004, 10.00 am…
Its been 24 hours.
The sky is as beautiful as ever… the world didn’t stop. I know I will move on eventually. Bumps on the road is inevitable… but I believe that I will pick myself up, dust it off and get on with my life. But for now… I just want mine to stop… just for a little while to let me grieve a little for my two angels.
Dear Tristan and Kiefer,
Daddy and Mummy will always love you forever… we will miss you.
Thank you for letting us feel how great parents are.
Thank you for bringing us the joy and happiness even though it was a little short-lived… but it was good and will always be part of us.
We were so looking forward to your arrival… but we know that it will never be. We will take comfort in knowing that you will have each other for company wherever you are.
We know that our angels will be looking out for us and their little brothers and sisters.
Take care… you will always be our two little angels.
Luv
Daddy and Mummy
