Mummy has been feeling lethargic... maybe because I have been too engulfed in my own negative thoughts of late. Pulling myself out of the bed and the prospect of going to work every morning is enough to kill me... ok perhaps I should be grateful that I still have a job... but somehow it doesn't seem to perk me up.
I am trying to console myself that it is just the usual phase that we all go through at certain points in life - the need for some changes every now and then in order to keep us focus... sounds a bit ironic but so much truth to it.
Demoralised... lethargic... bleak... (insufficient) words that describe how I feel about my job right now. Oh yes... and jumpy... I jump everytime the phone rings because the thought that it might be an applicant pressuring me for an answer freaks the hell out of me.
Think I need something else to defract those thoughts of mine.
Wednesday 28 July 2004
Monday 26 July 2004
Warning: Tolerance Level Running Low !
My tolerance level with my boss is running low... I don't know how long more to go before I buckle.
She has been sitting on my work for one whole week and the applicants are chasing me for the approval. She probably doesn't feel the heat because I am the one who is being sandwiched... having to deal with all the calls and queries. So much for being pro-enterprising... what an insult to the word.
She pissed me off big time early in the morning. Was trying to explain to her that we can just open up the CD and check the files in the CD... we don't need to go to our IT department for that (it is just that simple and I do not have the foggiest clue why she had to rope in everybody for something that we can resolve on our own end) and she had to cut me off with "ok ok ok ok". As usual, she only wants to be spoon-fed with the answer.
Firstly, even though I am her subordinate but it doesn't mean that she can be rude to me... she needs to learn to respect everyone around her and not just her superiors.
Secondly, it is only necessary that she keeps herself updated of how things are getting done even though she has delegated it to her staff. She has the tendency to absolve herself from something which she couldn't be bothered to look at and expect us to resolve it for her.
Thirdly, if it is something which one is unsure of... learn the ropes so that you will know how to deal with it the next time round. She is obviously not interested to even try and understand the subject at all. How can a person continue to grow in a job and to keep up with changes with such an attitude?
It is almost 4.30 pm... she had promised in the morning to clear out the work but I haven't heard from her yet. Whether she throws the file out or not by today... it spells disaster for me. It either means that I have to wait for another day or work overtime because the work will only be passed on to me minutes before knocking off.
This is so damn frustrating!!!!
She has been sitting on my work for one whole week and the applicants are chasing me for the approval. She probably doesn't feel the heat because I am the one who is being sandwiched... having to deal with all the calls and queries. So much for being pro-enterprising... what an insult to the word.
She pissed me off big time early in the morning. Was trying to explain to her that we can just open up the CD and check the files in the CD... we don't need to go to our IT department for that (it is just that simple and I do not have the foggiest clue why she had to rope in everybody for something that we can resolve on our own end) and she had to cut me off with "ok ok ok ok". As usual, she only wants to be spoon-fed with the answer.
Firstly, even though I am her subordinate but it doesn't mean that she can be rude to me... she needs to learn to respect everyone around her and not just her superiors.
Secondly, it is only necessary that she keeps herself updated of how things are getting done even though she has delegated it to her staff. She has the tendency to absolve herself from something which she couldn't be bothered to look at and expect us to resolve it for her.
Thirdly, if it is something which one is unsure of... learn the ropes so that you will know how to deal with it the next time round. She is obviously not interested to even try and understand the subject at all. How can a person continue to grow in a job and to keep up with changes with such an attitude?
It is almost 4.30 pm... she had promised in the morning to clear out the work but I haven't heard from her yet. Whether she throws the file out or not by today... it spells disaster for me. It either means that I have to wait for another day or work overtime because the work will only be passed on to me minutes before knocking off.
This is so damn frustrating!!!!
Sunday 25 July 2004
Catching Up...
The start of a new week is finally drawing near. The past week was a crazy one, with Mummy running from places to places... thanks (and no thanks) to my indecisive boss... always changing her mind at the very last minute. The problem with her is that she expects everyone to work around her schedule... I can't help but feel that she can be overly self-centered at times (or should I say most of the times). Sigh... and still no news for all the job applications sent out.
Because of my messed up schedule... I am losing track of time and tide... with lots of reading up to catch up on for the forum boards and emails to clear. Daddy has gone to his friend's place to discuss their gathering on 8 August... so that gave me the opportunity to surf the net and check my emails.
The show cause hearing last Thursday was pretty boring. Sat around wasting my time in the Court. However seeing how the various lawyers presented their client's case... I have to agree that men make better barrister. After the lunch break, while waiting for the afternoon session to begin... I overheard 2 officers from Anti-Vice Branch making snide remarks of respondents who wrote in to them. Why is it that as human we are always so quick to judge... so unhesitant to stereotype the people around us? I believe that the World will be a better place to live in if we are more tolerant... more prepared to see and listen with an open mind... be it the judicial system or in our personal life. But I guess it sounds a little too good to be true.
Did alot of catching up with my friends over the course of the week... in other words "lots of makan too". There goes my plan to cut back on stuffing myself with food.
Time to rest and prepare for a new week, a new day... nite nite.
Because of my messed up schedule... I am losing track of time and tide... with lots of reading up to catch up on for the forum boards and emails to clear. Daddy has gone to his friend's place to discuss their gathering on 8 August... so that gave me the opportunity to surf the net and check my emails.
The show cause hearing last Thursday was pretty boring. Sat around wasting my time in the Court. However seeing how the various lawyers presented their client's case... I have to agree that men make better barrister. After the lunch break, while waiting for the afternoon session to begin... I overheard 2 officers from Anti-Vice Branch making snide remarks of respondents who wrote in to them. Why is it that as human we are always so quick to judge... so unhesitant to stereotype the people around us? I believe that the World will be a better place to live in if we are more tolerant... more prepared to see and listen with an open mind... be it the judicial system or in our personal life. But I guess it sounds a little too good to be true.
Did alot of catching up with my friends over the course of the week... in other words "lots of makan too". There goes my plan to cut back on stuffing myself with food.
Time to rest and prepare for a new week, a new day... nite nite.
Monday 19 July 2004
Busy Busy Bumble Bee
Today is the start of a busy week for Mummy... so much so that I dread the coming.
This morning was packed with phone calls to make and rounding up of quotations for the mechanical recording of this Thursday show cause hearing. Needless to say the mad rush is due to that inefficient boss of mine. Tuesday and Friday will be out of the office to attend some testing of this new system set up by our parent Ministry... and Thursday will be spent in the Court. For these... the time I have in the office will be reduced considerably. I gotta to clear the work in the shortest possible time.
Even the evenings are totally booked out... Tuesday evening gotta go for my menicure and pedicure... Wednesday will be catching King Arthur, Thursday evening we will be celebrating birthday for Daddy's granny, Friday evening will be meeting Jocey for dinner, Saturday afternoon has a high-tea gathering with my kakis, Saturday evening will need to go back for my mum's place for dinner and Sunday evening we are going to celebrate my dad's birthday.
Hopefully I will survive to see next week... and hopefully a week which is not as burnt out as this week.
This morning was packed with phone calls to make and rounding up of quotations for the mechanical recording of this Thursday show cause hearing. Needless to say the mad rush is due to that inefficient boss of mine. Tuesday and Friday will be out of the office to attend some testing of this new system set up by our parent Ministry... and Thursday will be spent in the Court. For these... the time I have in the office will be reduced considerably. I gotta to clear the work in the shortest possible time.
Even the evenings are totally booked out... Tuesday evening gotta go for my menicure and pedicure... Wednesday will be catching King Arthur, Thursday evening we will be celebrating birthday for Daddy's granny, Friday evening will be meeting Jocey for dinner, Saturday afternoon has a high-tea gathering with my kakis, Saturday evening will need to go back for my mum's place for dinner and Sunday evening we are going to celebrate my dad's birthday.
Hopefully I will survive to see next week... and hopefully a week which is not as burnt out as this week.
Tuesday 13 July 2004
I Am New (yes... starting anew that is)
Got the outcome of my appraisal yesterday. Was placed in Band D, the worse band... so no further increment or performance bonus for this year. The reason given - I am still new in the Board.
Actually after the talk given by CE last Thursday... I walked away feeling baffled with what I heard. He was telling us not to be dishearten because there are good officers being put into Band D when the officers of the same cohort are ranked in order. The hidden message that I hear is of course the Board is trying hard not to differ too much from the fixed percentage they have set for each band and hence some officers have been sacrificed in the process. The ranking is tied to the increment and bonus... so are they trying to tell us that "sorry you did well but since you are in Band D, we can't recognise your efforts duly... so just too bad".
Having spoken to my direct boss... all she could say was that it was because I am new (hello I have been with the Board for more than a year), definitely not because I am not performing up to standard and won't be in the lowest band come next year. She wants me to continue the way I have been working (well that is provided if I am still with the Board) and not feel upset over this. Told her that I would like to know what are the factors the Board takes into consideration when they decide who in which band... she obviously ain't too sure about it herself and so far the Board has kept mum about it as well. I doubt that she will get back to me with anything concrete even though as a staff I feel that I have the right to know in order to justify my "death".
Oh well despite feeling crappy about what I have heard (definitely not feeling sorry for myself)... am taking it well. Maybe because the amount involved is just a token sum... it was either NIL, $10, $20, $30 or $40 max. God... I am so out of here!!!
Daddy got an increment of close to 10% and 1.2 months bonus though... good for him. Mummy has no luck where money is concerned... I think I have resigned myself to fate... but still I am so out of here!!!
Actually after the talk given by CE last Thursday... I walked away feeling baffled with what I heard. He was telling us not to be dishearten because there are good officers being put into Band D when the officers of the same cohort are ranked in order. The hidden message that I hear is of course the Board is trying hard not to differ too much from the fixed percentage they have set for each band and hence some officers have been sacrificed in the process. The ranking is tied to the increment and bonus... so are they trying to tell us that "sorry you did well but since you are in Band D, we can't recognise your efforts duly... so just too bad".
Having spoken to my direct boss... all she could say was that it was because I am new (hello I have been with the Board for more than a year), definitely not because I am not performing up to standard and won't be in the lowest band come next year. She wants me to continue the way I have been working (well that is provided if I am still with the Board) and not feel upset over this. Told her that I would like to know what are the factors the Board takes into consideration when they decide who in which band... she obviously ain't too sure about it herself and so far the Board has kept mum about it as well. I doubt that she will get back to me with anything concrete even though as a staff I feel that I have the right to know in order to justify my "death".
Oh well despite feeling crappy about what I have heard (definitely not feeling sorry for myself)... am taking it well. Maybe because the amount involved is just a token sum... it was either NIL, $10, $20, $30 or $40 max. God... I am so out of here!!!
Daddy got an increment of close to 10% and 1.2 months bonus though... good for him. Mummy has no luck where money is concerned... I think I have resigned myself to fate... but still I am so out of here!!!
Monday 12 July 2004
Officially 27
Mummy is officially 27 as of 9 July 2004.
Got a pair of earrings from Daddy. He did a lousy job in hiding the pressie... so much so that I found it in less than 10 seconds.
We went for a spa session at Spa Botanica in the morning... simply relaxing. Daddy even fell asleep in the midst of it. As for me it was a good opportunity to relax those tensed up muscle at my neck, shoulder and back due to the on-going cough since more than a week ago.
Attended Kevin Kern's concert at the Esplanade in the evening... it was a pleasant coincidence cause he was only playing on 9 July. His music never fails to charm Mummy.
One of the audience proposed to his girlfriend in between the concert... gotta give him credit for the courage. Though we thought that one could have been pressured into saying "yes"... even if she had actually wanted to tell him that she wants to think about it... smart move for that guy. And yes... some of the other guys there must have felt the heat after that as well.
Had a great 27th birthday... and counting down to the next one to come.
Got a pair of earrings from Daddy. He did a lousy job in hiding the pressie... so much so that I found it in less than 10 seconds.
We went for a spa session at Spa Botanica in the morning... simply relaxing. Daddy even fell asleep in the midst of it. As for me it was a good opportunity to relax those tensed up muscle at my neck, shoulder and back due to the on-going cough since more than a week ago.
Attended Kevin Kern's concert at the Esplanade in the evening... it was a pleasant coincidence cause he was only playing on 9 July. His music never fails to charm Mummy.
One of the audience proposed to his girlfriend in between the concert... gotta give him credit for the courage. Though we thought that one could have been pressured into saying "yes"... even if she had actually wanted to tell him that she wants to think about it... smart move for that guy. And yes... some of the other guys there must have felt the heat after that as well.
Had a great 27th birthday... and counting down to the next one to come.
Monday 5 July 2004
Counting Down to the Counting Up to 27
Daddy and Mummy had fun at the KTV with our friends last night to celebrate my birthday. Its been a long time since someone sang me the birthday song... felt kindda weird... or maybe I just didn't want to be reminded that I am getting older (again). Should have known better not to sing... throat is getting a little uncomfy after yesterday's session. I think I am going to suffer water retention from the amount of water I have been drinking since Friday.
Its going to be a relaxing week for Mummy... will be away from office for tomorrow and the day after tomorrow to attend a training and Friday will be on leave to celebrate/mourn my 27th birthday.
Its going to be a relaxing week for Mummy... will be away from office for tomorrow and the day after tomorrow to attend a training and Friday will be on leave to celebrate/mourn my 27th birthday.
Saturday 3 July 2004
37.3 = Normal?
Daddy's interview with Singtel went well... but he needs to go through 2 more rounds of interview if selected. Let's keep our fingers and toes crossed for him.
After the sickly feeling on and off... finally fell sick on Thursday night. Was down with fever and the sore throat was unbearable... couldn't even swallow my saliva... the pain almost killed me.
The fever subsided a little in the morning. When the doctor recorded my temperature as 37.3 degree celsius... she told me that I wasn't running a fever. Hmmmm... maybe they raised the bar of a fever after the SARS period. She checked my throat and said that I wasn't suffering from sore throat as there wasn't any inflammation... but maybe it was just dry due to the air. I had to tell her that it was the upper part that was sore and I even had problem swallowing my saliva before she agreed to prescribe me lozenges. She made me felt as though I was there to con the medical certificate out of her.
Next time I will go to the doctor only when I am lying in bed and can't move... then again by that time, what I need is a death certificate and not medical certificate.
After the sickly feeling on and off... finally fell sick on Thursday night. Was down with fever and the sore throat was unbearable... couldn't even swallow my saliva... the pain almost killed me.
The fever subsided a little in the morning. When the doctor recorded my temperature as 37.3 degree celsius... she told me that I wasn't running a fever. Hmmmm... maybe they raised the bar of a fever after the SARS period. She checked my throat and said that I wasn't suffering from sore throat as there wasn't any inflammation... but maybe it was just dry due to the air. I had to tell her that it was the upper part that was sore and I even had problem swallowing my saliva before she agreed to prescribe me lozenges. She made me felt as though I was there to con the medical certificate out of her.
Next time I will go to the doctor only when I am lying in bed and can't move... then again by that time, what I need is a death certificate and not medical certificate.
Thursday 1 July 2004
Its July!!!
It is finally July... which also means that Mummy's birthday is round the corner and we can try and conceive again. This will be an exciting month.
Have been keeping a lookout for better job opportunities but so far there hasn't been any good news. Its not exactly the best time especially when baby-planning is on the plate as well... but I will just adopt the "whichever comes first basis".
Daddy is going for a job interview tomorrow at Singtel though... let's hope that lady luck smiles on him this time round.
I think I am finally falling sick... woke up with a bit of sore throat today... must be the result of the heaty food as well as the "Annual Haze Amalgamation".
Have been keeping a lookout for better job opportunities but so far there hasn't been any good news. Its not exactly the best time especially when baby-planning is on the plate as well... but I will just adopt the "whichever comes first basis".
Daddy is going for a job interview tomorrow at Singtel though... let's hope that lady luck smiles on him this time round.
I think I am finally falling sick... woke up with a bit of sore throat today... must be the result of the heaty food as well as the "Annual Haze Amalgamation".
